STOP…DROP…and ROLL

Dawn-Charmel is the CFO/ Owner of The Bag Lady Experience, LLC. In her spare time she enjoys writing poetry & plays.

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The song “Happy” which was written, produced, and performed by Pharrell Williams was a #1 song for much of 2014. Infectious, with a catchy tune and positive lyrics, the song made many people pat their feet and clap along without really thinking about it. It just happened automatically…and what a great example of what living free looks like and feels like! But there was another population of people who wouldn’t or couldn’t buy into the happy-parade being led by men, women and children around the world.  Some people were just stuck in the twists and turns of a hard, defeated life and were unable to “feel the happiness” and were wondering how to get there.

Many people live in a constant state of war between the person they want to be and the person they have defined themselves to be based on past experiences, the inability to forgive, and the opinion of others.

We are taught as young children to care about the opinion of others and when we don’t live up to expectations (self-imposed or otherwise), we feel that we have failed.  We allow this failure to derail us from our road to becoming positive, happy people.  We exist under ever-present scrutiny, sometimes making us feel that we are not good enough nor will we ever be. 

Having a negative opinion of oneself can result in the assumption that everyone shares that same opinion.  So we begin to mirror that view although it is not our true self. We walk through life never able to see ourselves as the strong and successful people that we are.  If we can consciously decide that we will no longer be directed by the opinion of others, we can move towards a happier more fulfilled life.

Happiness is not always automatic.  Sometimes we have to be taught how to be happy and then to make a conscious effort to achieve it.  Some things that we can do to move in the direction of happiness are:

• Surround ourselves with happy people.
• Devalue our failures and concentrate on our success.
• Appreciate what we have.
• Live in the “Now”.

As we begin our journey into 2015, we must no longer allow negative people and negative situations to define how we feel about ourselves and how we measure our success. There is no one specific situation or “thing” that defines who we are. We can truly write our own story and be who we want to be.  It may require that we make some changes or shift our thinking. Or we may just have to forgive ourselves for not living up to our own expectations and learn to see the good that lies within.  

We must STOP allowing what people say about us, or what people do to us to make us feel a certain way about ourselves.  Let’s become our own cheerleaders…cheer for ourselves so loudly that it drowns out the noise of the negative talk and thoughts of the people around us.  We have to DROP all the negativity…self doubt…insecurity…self-hatred…and unforgiveness, and learn to ROLL with the punches and move on.  We’ve got to toughen our skin and not be so easily diverted from our position of growth and personal fulfillment.

So when you find yourself stressing about bad choices and mistakes of the past, remember to STOP…DROP …and ROLL. You’ll be better for it.